Bradley's Buzz

Today's Bubbatune - Rachel Sweet

As I sit here drinking a Captain and Coke, I am reminded of a simpler time. A time when I was sweet sixteen, much cuter and a tad thinner, and not quite a lush. In fact, it was when I was 16; I had my very first drink. Also at 16, sweet chanteuse Rachel Sweet released her very first record. So one of us got a fairly great career while the other got a fairly great hangover. I’ll let you figure out which one is which.

RACHEL SWEET - …SO WELL (bub54)
Album Design by Bradley Jacobson

Track List:
1.Fool’s Gold
2.I Go To Pieces
3.Shadows Of The Night
4.Spellbound
5.B-A-B-Y
6.Billy & The Gun
7.Suspended Animation
8.Pin A Medal On Mary
9.Party Girl
10.Who Does Lisa Like?
11.I’ve Got A Reason
12.Voo Doo
13.Then He Kissed Me/Be My Baby
14.Tonight Ricky
15.Cuckoo Clock
16.Be Stiff
17.Hairspray
18.It’s So Different Here
19.A Teenage Prayer
20.New Age
21.Stranger In The House
22.Please Mr. Jailer
23.Everlasting Love (w/ Rex Smith)

THE STORY

Smokey and Evelyn Guenther were our next-door neighbors from the time we moved into our house when I was in the third grade, until high school when they sold their house and moved to a retirement home. Yes, those Guenthers were old souls but they loved the hooch and my parents loved them. So we spent countless hours together.

The Guenther’s had a few children of their own, most of whom were older than my parents. One such child was a truck driving whore named Gary and when I say that I mean it with the utmost affection for he was a pretty good truck driver I was told, and due to the amount of children coming out of the woodwork, he was a pretty good whore as well.

One of his sons was a hottie named Todd. My Aunt Sarah had the biggest crush on Todd and who could really blame her. He was the closest thing to Rick Springfield our town had ever seen. Every time my aunt would come to visit we were given instructions to let Smokey and Evelyn know, as they could then arrange for their grandson to visit as well.

One Saturday night, Sarah was babysitting for me while my parents were out a drinking and shaking up Mosinee. Sarah had promised to let me stay up and watch Solid Gold, as it was my favorite nighttime series. I was hoping she’d get distracted or fall asleep during it so that I might stay up and watch Madame’s Place, which followed it.

I thought for sure my distraction plan was going to happen when there was a knock on the door and hottie Todd Guenther was there. Sarah took out her retainer and did her best to pour on that Jacobson charm.

Her attempts to woo the Guenth man seemed to be going well as they sat and talked while I watched my show. They would laugh, they would flirt, I would want to puke and wonder why I didn’t have a Guenther to love me up.

But then Solid Gold would come back on and I would be transcended into the gold lame of those saucy dancers and the top 10 count down. Todd made a few jokes trying to jibe me by saying I only watched the show for the hot bods of those women dancers. “Oh Todd, if you only knew the hot bods I crave,” was my thought, but instead I smiled, ignored him and looked at those tight leather pants on the male dancers.

As Solid Gold progressed a feisty little number with long black hair was introduced, “Rachel Sweet singing her new song ‘Voo Doo'. Well voo doo that you do so well, I was in love. She was saucy, she was spicy, she had a strange voice made up of scratches, hisses and squeaks. I loved her.

As I was watching my show it occurred to me that my Aunt and Todd had somehow stopped talking. I wondered, if like I, they were so engrossed in the show they couldn’t speak either. But as I turned around I became mortified to find out, they weren’t even watching the show. They were kissing!

I just about lost it right there. How dare they ignore my show and me! What kind of role models were these people. I had to voice my opinion. And so I did. Sarah decided I was much too young to be up so late and I must be tired for speaking the way I was. So she was going to send me to bed.

“Send me to bed,” I thought, “No way sister. I’m staying up and watching Madame’s Place, because if I don’t, I’m telling my mother you were up in her room making out with Todd Guenther.”

Well, that was all it took to get her to calm down, and that was about all it took to get Todd Guenther out of the house. Apparently, a hot Guenther is no match for a bright white haired kid with a penchant for over dramatics.

If only my story ended there. Instead, it goes on and on…

Smokey and Evelyn always had huge 4th of July family picnics at Lake DuBay. The summer of my 16th birthday was just one more of those old picnics, or so I thought. For I discovered a little thing called Pabst Blue Ribbon.

As the summer heat wore on that day, I would go from the lake back to the picnic tables where the adults were all drinking and laughing and partying like it was 1929. Oh, how I wanted to be a grown up and hang out like that.

Of course all the Guenther grandchildren, children and who knows what else were there. Well, Todd wasn’t there but I figured since Sarah wasn’t there either that would explain the absence of the Guenth god.

After having all I could take of the beach, I decided I was going to be completely involved in this whole adult picnic thing. As the adults chatted and laughed, something terribly unfunny happened.

Smokey was telling one of his ultimate tall tales when Evelyn looked at her husband and gasped! “Smokey, your family jewels are hanging out,” she said.

I didn’t know what the old woman was talking about. I looked all over for emeralds and diamonds, searching under the picnic table for some rare gem the Guenther’s weren’t supposed to be showing. And that’s when I saw it… there hanging out of Smokey’s swim trunks like a flattened marble, one of his testicles! Just sitting there on the bench next to him. He laughed, tucked it away but I, I was mortified. I decided I needed a drink. So I had one.

I started by sneaking drinks off of everyone who was fool enough to leave a beer can sitting out. Then as the night progressed and they all got more and more inebriated, I moved up to having my own can. The adults seemed to get a kick out of the fact I had a beer in my hand. I didn’t bother to tell them that the one can they kept seeing was in actuality my fifth.

Oh how I had a ball… and not one of the family jewel kinds. I laughed, I cried, I told jokes, I heard jokes, I thought I was the life of the party. That is until I felt something creeping up on me, from the bottom of my gut. Something itching to get out and I had to let it out.

My parents decided it was time to go home around that moment. So we drove home with my mother pulling over at least twenty times to let her “baby” get out and puke his brains out.

When we got home, I tried to go to sleep but it didn’t look like it was going to be easy. As the bed began to swirl and those images of Rachel Sweet and Todd Guenther danced in my head, I had to once again let go, and again and again…

My mother came into my room, and helped me to the shower. I was sober enough to realize I didn’t want her to see any of my family jewels. But of course since I couldn’t walk, stand or sit, I did need her help. The whole shock of my mother seeing me nude, had me so upset, I didn’t even take off my socks before hopping into the shower.

Eventually, I made it through the night. I got through the humility of puking in front of every single Guenther ever born, I got through the humility of my mother seeing my naked teenage body, I even got through the humility of knowing I had seen an 85 year old ball, but what I knew I would never get over, was that feeling of being drunk!

I told my mother than under no uncertain terms would I ever be drinking again. She was happy to hear that and figured I learned a very valuable lesson. That lesson lasted about six months before I fell in with the wrong crowd.

The wrong crowd ironically ended up being a bunch of 21 year olds, one who was – you guessed it, one of Gary Guenther’s other roadside kids.




THE SONGS
By the time I had “discovered” Rachel Sweet, she had already released three albums. The first album Fool Around came out in 1978 in the UK and had a release stateside the following year. It was a fun little piece of pop/punk/country with Rachel being dubbed by Stiff Records as the “Little Girl with The Big Voice.” They were really pushing the “little girl” boundaries as well as they tried to pass her off as a Lolita type and hyped her age of 16 a lot. The songs she did were a hybrid of just about everything but the fact no one could ignore was the girl could sing.

The album did fairly well and gave her a UK single hit with “B-A-B-Y”. She toured on the Be Stiff tour and then did another album.

1980’s Protect The Innocent is regarded by most as the definitive Rachel Sweet album. Still clinging to some of the country punk she had on the debut, most of it was new wave to the extreme. Critics are still talking about it, saying if Britney Spears had as much sex appeal as Rachel delivered, the Brits would’ve never been aired on television.

The following year came ...And Then He Kissed Me, which moved Rachel into more mainstream rock than her previous endeavors. Included on the album was the original version of “Shadows Of The Night.” Yes, that “Shadows Of The Night” by my girl. It also included Rachel’s only US hit, a sappy though not unbearable duet with Rex Smith (now he’s unbearable) on “Everlasting Love.”

After that only one album came 1982’s Blame It On Love, which included that “Voo Doo”, I heard so long ago. Since then Rachel, a high school drop out, went to college, earned her degree, and as acted in sitcoms, and with the persistence of John Waters recorded a few nuggets including the theme song to his movie “Hairspray.”

No matter the lack of material for such a long period of time, these songs just floor me every time I listen to them. I had downloaded a ton of them but never really listened to them until recently and now I’m the hugest fan. I have “reissued” two of her albums, and made this compilation featuring some of the best songs. It’s a real shame her music isn’t readily available. There is only one compilation currently in print and it doesn’t include any of her post 1980 music. But thanks to me, we have …So Well.

…So Well (named after that brilliant line from “Voo Doo”) begins with “Fool’s Gold” from the Protect The Innocent album. It’s a rocking little song that combines the best of Rachel's world - a little bit of new wave with a little bit of that old 60s girl group feel - “I’m a fool I supoooooose…” “but I would search the world for that Fool’s Gold.” It was a single that never quite cut it on the charts, but it’s one piece of lovely little pop.

Rachel Sweet was the protégé of producer Liam Sternberg and he produced the brunt of the debut album. Stiff Records feeling his stuff may not get our girl a hit added a few extra ditties to the album including a Del Shannon cover “I Go To Pieces.” Rachel has a way with a lyric and she can sing anything. In this case, she makes up a one-woman girl group singing the 60s ditty with ferocity and pain, just as it should be.

Fool Around was the only Rachel Sweet you could get on CD for a while but now even that’s been pulled, but because of that initial CD release, I was able to get all the songs from the debut. Thus, this collection uses about 10 of those songs. The album was so eclectic; you’d never recognize the songs all come from the same album.

“B-A-B-Y” was the big hit for Rachel (in the UK #35). Again it’s a 60s cover but the song was launched with such an importance put on the fact it was a 16 year old singing about subject matter not normally sung by a 16 year old, the song got a lot of promotion. “Baby/ Oh Baby/ I love to call you baby/Baby, ooh my baby/I love it for you to call me baby/and I can’t stop loving you/and I won’t stop calling you baby…” Rachel’s almost throaty squeak filled voice fills the whole song against the horns and the drums, she really “can’t help it… B-A-B-Y, Baby/B-A-B-Y, Baby.”

“Suspended Animation” has 1978 written all over it. You just don’t hear titles like that after 1983. The song was the B-side to the UK “B-A-B-Y” single. It’s a simple piece of new wave pop beginning with a rock guitar riff and a few horns. It’s a song the Waitresses could’ve written. “Why must it be me who must wait/what do the other girls got/that I ain’t got../ I’m down on my knees/I just got to please/all the desire I have for him…” Geez, no wonder she was pushed off as a Lolita.

Four of the best songs from this time period have a punky attitude set to a more pop musical background. “Pin A Medal On Mary” sounds like a 1960s Rolling Stone song and with its lyrics, it could have been. Sounding similar to the Stones “Stupid Girl” this song is a hilarious bitch slap about a boyfriend who is seeing Mary on the side, “You said you were going to the bathroom/but you were gone for half an hour/You came back so disarranged/you hadn’t been there for a shower/Pin a medal on Mary/she’s the girl who tore our love apart/pin a medal on Mary/she’s the girl who stole your heart/you’ve been acting so scary/coming through the door/and looking so coy/Pin a medal on Mary/she will steal your boy.” As the song progresses into the second verse, “you said you were walking in the garden/but you were so long it seemed like hours/you weren’t taking in the air/and I know you weren’t picking flowers,” and a giant defiant “NO!” before the second chorus kicks in.

In a similar vein is “Who Does Lisa Like?” whose title comes off sounding some kind of fluff a 16 year old may sing. But not this 16 year old. The song is set to a punk reggae rhythm and sure, the song is all about some teens wondering who or what Lisa is doing but its done so well, this isn't teen fluff at all. The song begins with the girls “sitting around in the Firestone parking lot but it’s all right…” The girls all wonder who does Lisa like? Since she’s wearing “flashy clothes/oooh ta ta ta” and the phone is always busy, “ooh ta ta ta…” Set to a reggae beat the song ends with some hilarious lines as the girls in the parking lot aren’t going to worry about real world events, “Nothing’s important/if that’s not important/so don’t change the subject…” For these girls know what the important things are, “People are starving in India/Fighting in Baghdad/but we don’t care/We ask ourselves but it’s not any of our business/besides we don’t dare/who does Lisa like?”

The punkiest of these first Rachel Sweet tunes has to be “Cuckoo Clock” which is just an odd song all around. It’s also one that really grows on you. Perhaps the fact Rachel was signed to Stiff Records made the inevitable punky pop song a necessity. Written by Sternberg the song tells the story of the girl who lives in the “Cuckoo Clock.” “What’s in the cuckoo clock?/don’t leave the thing unlocked,” a drum beat comes in and we find out “I’m a toy singer/so don’t be alarmed/if I sound real/I look real/I am real…” Apparently Rachel didn’t understand the song when she recorded it and Liam instructed her to just scream so she did and it all came out as pure genius – silly genius, but genius none the less.

The country twinged Rachel appears first in her take on Elvis Costello’s “Stranger In The House”. Not so much a homage to country music, this is a straight up country song. Rachel again finds her twangy voice and declares from the beginning, “This never was one of the great romances/but I thought you’d always have those young boy eyes/and now they’re giving tired and bitter glances/at the ghost of the girl who walks around in my disguise…”

Like myself, Rachel has decreed Elvis Costello a musical genius and this was her first and only recorded Elvis cover, while Swivek launched “Girls Talk” upon the world. Either way, we were both way ahead of Linda Ronstadt’s god awful “Alison” from 1978.

Fool Around didn’t just come up with country punk, new wave and 60s girl group to create its own sound, a little bit of jazzy reggae was thrown in as well. “It’s So Different Here” takes the reggae punk beat of “Who Does Lisa Like?” and tones it down a notch or two. A silky little groove drives the song where images of “women carry water jugs” and the heat of the island are felt thorough the speakers. “Women walk in the shade with water jugs/it’s so different here/so hot/no phones or cars/it’s so different here/it’s so hot in here….”

Stiff scouts discovered Rachel when they visited Akron, Ohio – home to such things as Devo and Rachel Sweet. She joined the Akron Stiff tour and then joined the Be Stiff tour which was a roster of Stiff Records acts. Each one of those acts got the chance to record their own version of Devo’s “Be Stiff” – the unofficial anthem of Stiff Records.

Rachel’s version is country twinged but it’s the alternative country so many hard rock bands attempted in the late 80s. She was ahead of her time all around. Rachel uses her best southern twang to add effect and as she hiccups, “Be Stiff/baby be stiff…” you can’t help but hiccup right along.

Rachel’s second album Protect The Innocent was the one that caught every critic’s eye. Unfortunately it didn’t catch anyone else’s. Containing less of the country punk flavor or 60s girl group than the first, it was mostly twelve songs of new wave pop.

“Spellbound” was the one song closest to being a hit from Protect The Innocent hitting #107 on the US Pop Charts. It also happened to be one Rachel loved performing live. Set to a jumpy little new wave beat sounding almost similar to “I Eat Cannibals” with its dramatic beats but coming across just a little more accessible. The song tells of a failed love attempt, “I knew you were bad but I didn’t care/I just had to get next to you/they said you were dangerous/I knew that you could take me there/and I thought I could play your game/give my heart and get away again…” but alas she is “Spellbound/Spellbound/you stick pins in my heart…”

Rachel’s annunciations through out the song make it an ultimate treat in a whole compilation of extreme treats. In almost every song Rachel sounds just slightly different and it all comes off so naturally it’s really unbelievable.

“I’ve Got A Reason” is another of the new wave gems Rachel put on her 1980 album. A guitar driven little rocker, the song begins with a simple keyboard and Rachel’s booming voice, “I’ve got a reason/I’ve been feeling blue…” and from there it goes on as she begins screaming, “I’ve got a reeeeeeasson/I’m feeling this way/I’ve got a reason/and I’m going to make you pay.” Rachel continues her wrath as she’s going “to use very book in the book/don’t confuse me/don’t abuse now…” Now you just know how I love the revenge songs and the sassy female singer so this is an ultimate of mine.

Dipping into the covers once again, Rachel chose Lou Reed’s Hollywood “New Age”. Again, it’s one of my favorite songs by Rachel, and it’s one of my favorite vocal performances from her. Beginning with a guitar riff and Rachel’s high pitched almost baby like voice, both almost inaudible, the song begins, “Can I have a photograph?…” and with each line the song gets louder and louder until, “You’re over the hill right now/looking for love…”

Then the song kicks in with its chorus, “I’ll come running to you/darling when you want me…” and then, “Can I have an autograph?…” as the story progresses of the love of a Hollywood affair, “You’re over the hill right now/looking for love…”

Finally, the drums and guitars kick in and Rachel begins a whole new vocal attack, “Something’s got a hold on me and I don’t know what/something’s got a hold on me and I don’t know what/It’s the beginning of a new age/it’s the beginning of a new age…” the background vocals come chiming in, Rachel “ooooohs” and “aaaahs” and the whole thing fades out. Excellent, excellent. Luckily I got all these songs and was able to create a reissue of Protect The Innocent in the bubbatunes collection.

Though the album didn’t have as much in diversity as the debut, Rachel was able to incorporate a few little nuggets of different musical styles. “Tonight Ricky” is just about two bars from being a jazz song. Smoky vocals tell the tale of Rachel’s midnight rendezvous with Ricky. This is the song that the critic noted coursed so much more sensuality of teenage lust than anything Britney could’ve dreamed of. And Rachel didn’t even take her clothes off…

“I know we’re too young to stay up on Sunday night/but the innocent of youth must fall behind/I’ll call you when the coast is clear and everything is alright/oh, we’re too young to want to waste the time/tonight Ricky we can be alone/tonight Ricky there ain’t nobody home/tonight Ricky we can find out how we fell/Tonight Ricky it’s real…” At 17, wasn’t lust fun?

Now for the reason Rachel Sweet began to intrigue me all over again – “Shadows Of The Night.” I hadn’t known Rachel actually did this song, all I knew was that an outside writer named DL Byron had written it and Pat Benatar recorded in 1982. When Pat’s box set came out in 1999, she mentioned that DL Byron sent her the song but never bothered to tell her or her label that Rachel Sweet had changed some of the words he wrote, and thus changed some of the words Pat was singing. Pat ended up changing lyrics as well and the real writing credits should be DL Byron/Rachel Sweet/Pat Benatar/Myron Grombacher, but only DL Byron was getting credit. That is until Rachel stepped in.

It all worked out, but was a bit of a mess for Pat and the boys. Meanwhile, Rachel’s version recorded in 1981 was released as a single but didn’t do anything on the charts. This version begins with a piano and the opening lines, which are different from Pat’s new wave metal induced power ballad, “You said Oh girl, it’s a cold world/when we’re restless and we’re young/you said slow down/it’s a showdown/but our time will surely come/ransom your heart but baby don’t look back/cause Independence day has come…” Even the chorus is slightly altered as Rachel runs “through” the Shadows Of The Night while Pat opts to run "with" them. Nonetheless, Rachel’s version does turn into a rock ballad as it should be, and though I’m always partial to Pat, this is a really cool version of the song.

…And Then He Kissed Me, also contained one of the cleverest ways of incorporating 60s covers. “Then He Kissed Me/Be My Baby” begins with a straight up cover of “Then He Kissed Me” but as the crescendo of that songs comes around, “He kissed me like I’ve never been kissed before/and he kissed me like I wanted to be kissed forever” and then she breaks into, “so I said, Be My, Be My little baby…” and the song goes into the Ronettes cover. Once again, it was released as a single that never really went anywhere. This was one clever overlooked 19 year old.

My two favorite songs by Rachel Sweet also happen to be taken from that 1981 album. “Billy & The Gun”, written by Rachel, is a dramatic tale done to a piano with little instrumentation here and there, Rachel talks about her worrisome friend Billy who seems hell bent on destroying his life; “On a hot winter night there’s a single light burning from his room…” the song begins, “I yell but there’s no reply/I hold my breath as the seconds roll by/I run up with my heart in my eyes/we’re only having fuuun/billy and the gun…”

The song just goes uphill from there as Rachel recounts Christine, “the beauty queen of the local high” whose “1,2,3 in Biology/drove the young boys wild,” including Billy. But Rachel reminds him that “One great love isn’t all it seems/why don’t you hand me that damn machine/we’re only having fuuun/billy and the gun.”

The four verse song continues as Billy thinks about flying with the angels and taking that game with the gun a little far and in my ultimate favorite lyric Rachel tells him, “Oh Billy you don’t want a heart of steel/cause you won’t hurt but baby you won’t feel/and as long as the pain is real/we’re only having fuuuun/billy and the gun.” I love it… It’s something everyone should hear and if things go well you will as I’m planning a Swivek cover.

The second fav from Rachel is “Party Girl”, another song written by Rachel all by herself. The song starts with a drum roll and a piano driven rock beat and once again she is handing out big sister advice only this time it’s to the party girl of the title, “You want to be a party girl/a party girl tonight/you say you’re gonna be a party girl/a party girl tonight/” and the clincher, “Don’t let him touch your heart/don’t let him touch your soul/don’t let him know you save it up for rock and roll/don’t let him touch your soul baby/you’re the party girl…” I love it….

After …And Then He Kissed Me, Rachel took the helm and produced her own record at the ripe old age of 20. Blame It On Love was again not much of a chart success and to be perfectly honest, I’ve yet to find a used copy of it I can afford. The one song I do know that came off the album was Voo Doo. I loved this song from the moment I heard it. Completely 1982, the song was added to the Valley Girl soundtrack when it was released on CD and for good reason. Combining Rachel’s salty vocals, it is moody and fun all at the same time, the song did make it to #79 on the Pop Charts so it wasn’t a complete loss.

It’s definitely a rock song and not the same type of music she did prior to 1981, but her vocals are great and the song is very to sing along with, which I always love, “If it’s Voo doo honey/who can tell?/with the Voo Doo that you do…so well.”

After retiring from her music career, Rachel went to college and began to do acting and writing to pay her bills. But John Waters, always intrigued with a Lolita and the off kilter, brought her back to the recording studio to record the theme song to his 1988 movie Hairspray and with it’s 60s beats, the hilarious lyrics and Rachel’s squeak, the whole thing came together beautifully.

So it’s no surprise when John did his homage to 50s musicals in Cry Baby, the female vocal was done by Rachel. Though not in the movie, both Johnny Depp and his co-stars vocals are dubbed. In the female case of the big stand out, “Please Mr. Jailer” it’s Rachel doing the grind in the down and dirty ballad.

Rachel also recorded vocals for the oh so dreamy 50s cover “A Teenage Prayer,” a fitting little song for someone who themselves was a teenage prayer for many a teenage love sick fool, and some dirty old men as well I’m sure.

The last song on this compilation is the obligatory US hit single. After Rachel’s Stiff contract ended, Columbia/CBS became her main label through out the world. They wanted Rachel to do a duet and she was all for it – hoping they’d call in Graham Parsons or her idol Elvis Costello. Instead she got flavor of the month Rex Smith.

The song was almost as cheesy as her singing partner, “Everlasting Love” another cover. Gloria Estefan would again take it to the top ten years ago, but she’s pretty inconsequential to this story (or the world for that matter). Anyway, the song is one everyone seems to know, “Hearts go astray/leaving hurt when they go/I went away just when you needed me so,” and it’s Rex who starts the whole thing, but Rachel takes it from there until the shared chorus, “Open up your eyes/then you realize/here I stand with my everlasting love…” Set to a pseudo rock disco riff, it’s not a bad song, it’s just not a great song either and in the word of one critic, “Rex Smith sings it like a Hallmark commercial…” and in fact he really does.

I guess it was his way of having something to sing when he did his stint as co-host on Solid Gold, after my boy Andy Gibb took a sabbatical from fame and that slut Victoria Principal who sent him on a downward spiral to death… but that’s a whole different story.

posted by swivek @ 9:04 AM 5 comments

Today's Bubbatune - Kim Carnes

Smoking is one of the worst things you can do to your body. I should know I’ve been smoking for years and I don’t like my body. So there, now you know. Others owe their whole careers to smoking, could you imagine Bette Davis without a smoke in her hand, puffing, waving it and telling you what a shit you were, or Kim Carnes, the singer who gave us “Bette Davis Eyes.” Had she not taken up that first toke and found a love for the whiskey we wouldn’t have the great compilation I have for you today.

KIM CARNES – ROUGH EDGES (bub15)
Album design by Bradley Jacobson

Track List:
1. Voyeur
2. Invisible Hands
3. Rough Edges
4. Bette Davis Eyes
5. More Love
6. Abadabadango
7. Does It Make You Remember
8. Crazy In The Night (Barking At Airplanes)
9. Don't Call It Love
10.I'll Be Here Where The Heart Is
11.Looker
12.Draw Of The Cards
13.I Pretend
14.Divided Hearts
15.Still Hold On
16.Take It On The Chin
17.Young Love
18.The Arrangement (w/ Martha Davis)
19.You Make My Heart Beat Faster
(And That's All That Matters)



THE STORY

My years in school were not easy. I hated most of it as I became a bit of an outcast as the years went by. The worst part being I went to a very small school so I couldn’t just disappear into the background. Everyone knew everyone and they always had and they always would. It was very depressing to me.

With that in mind, let’s talk about some of those others I knew my whole life. There was a girl I went to school with named Beth Svanda (once again these names are gold and I did not make them up). All through elementary school she had the longest hair of all the girls. She would wear in a long braid and was apparently the envy of many girls. I thought she looked like a piece of hillbilly trash but what did I know.

One winter at recess a bunch of us were standing around the puddles of rain and snow. The puddles had just frozen over but were barely full of ice. We were playing a winter game which has no real name but goes something like this, you put your foot ever so slowly on the top of the ice and watch it break all around your foot. It’s a game of chance really to see if your foot falls into the water and leaves you soppy and upset.

As we played the game it occurred to me it might be downright hysterical if someone were to fall into the puddle as they ever so gently put their little pooty on the puddle. I decided as Beth Svanda lifted her sensible hillbilly shoe that she was the perfect specimen to test out my hilarity theory.

As Beth put her foot on the ice, I pushed her! Poor Beth fell right into the pool braids and all. I laughed, but others were more mortified than anything. I didn’t get it; I thought this was a game of chance. A game some were bound to lose. I decided I had better take action as soon as possible.

I ran to the recess monitor and told her I was sick. I couldn’t go on one more minute without going home to the loving arms of my mommy and her chicken soup. The recess monitor sent me into the principal’s office and we tried to call my mother.

Of course my mother wasn’t home. She was on one of her pilgrimages to the blue light special of Kmart and was obviously oblivious to her son’s latest traumatic experience.
I was forced to head back to class and come up with a new plan.

Luckily, my mother had raised me on soap operas and as I headed up the stairs to my third grade class, it occurred to me. It wasn’t I who pushed Beth Svanda into the puddle of water – it was my evil twin! How brilliant! I knew this plan could not fail.

I walked into the classroom, my blonde head held high knowing I could get through this completely unscathed. By this time the whole school was a buzz with the hillbilly thrown into the lake but I didn’t care for I, Bradley, innocent boy of the world, knew nothing of this horrible thing that happened to sweet innocent Beth Svanda and her outrageous horse tail.

As I sat down and Mrs. McQuen (once again, not made up) looked at me with her tired eyes, I had a feeling I was going to have to make this convincing. I wondered aloud, “Hey what’s happening Mrs. McQ?”

“You pushed Beth into a puddle,” she said. It wasn’t even a question, it was a statement made to make me look like a bad guy. I insisted I hadn’t the foggiest clue as to what she was talking about.

Beth was there to recant the entire story saying she was by the puddle and I was there and everyone saw me push her. I couldn’t believe it, and I couldn’t have been more convincing. I told them all I was not there.

“Maybe it was my twin,” I said.

Mrs. McQuen was suddenly interested. “Your twin?” she asked.

“Yes, my twin, it certainly wasn’t me so maybe it was my twin brother.”

“Maybe it was him,” said Beth coming to my rescue when in fact it was she who should be in disbelief.

Mrs. McQuen sent me to the principal’s office telling me to think about what I had done while Beth Svanda and the rest of the class were actually wondering what class my twin brother was in and how many times they had confused us with each other.

But should you start to feel sorry for Beth Svanda and think of me as some evil child with cute dimples and frost white hair, let me tell you that wench with the braid got her revenge a few years later.

In the sixth grade, I found myself in a bit of a pickle. Beth Svanda and I had become pretty good friends. We were also hanging out with a gal named Monica Dumonson, who up to that point had been someone I had never talked to. As it would later turn out Mona D (as she was dubbed by me) and I would have a lasting friendship. Longer than that crazy wench Beth… and here’s why.

That year of the middle school, Beth thought she was fancy pants big ass big city for she had done the unthinkable. She cut her braid! She now had a sassy little Dorothy Hamill ‘do.

One day she took out of her back pack a big pack full of make up. She showed all the girls (and me) all the make up she had. She was going to show the girls how a new glamour queen should behave. Also in that little pack she had was a pack of (gasp!) cigarettes! Of course no one ever saw those cigarettes except for me. Otherwise this story wouldn’t have turned out as twisted as it became.

My dad always smoked when I was a kid and I remember running down to the grocery store and buying them for him. Can you imagine something like that? So seeing them wasn’t such a big deal but knowing we were adolescents and probably shouldn’t have them was a whole new thrilling experience.

At lunch break, Beth and I ran down by the dumpster and took the cigarettes out of her bag. I thought I’d be cool and show some of the other kids that we had cigarettes. As it turns out, I showed the wrong kid.

But this is where the story gets even more twisted. I showed those smokes to a kid named Chris, who was the ballsiest, the most brazen little bastard you ever met. If anyone was smoking in the sixth grade it was him.

He told me we were supposed to have cigarettes and couldn’t believe that I would bring them to school. I told him I didn’t bring them to school but he didn’t seem to care. He ran off back to some other kids while I wondered where I had gone wrong. I went to the “cool” kid, I had the “cool” smokes, why wasn’t I in with the crowd?

I went back to Beth with the cigarettes, as I didn’t need them since they obviously weren’t going to get me accepted. She turned on me saying she didn’t want them anymore either. So I threw them away. I walked to the dumpster, threw them in and walked back to school thinking that was the end of that. But I was wrong.

Chris, the little rebel with the heart of steel saw me throw the cigarettes away, pulled them out of the dumpster and ran to the principal’s office telling them I had brought them to school! Can you even believe it!

I was called into the office where the star witness sat there smugly telling them the whole story about how I had showed him the cigarettes – even saying how I had brought them to school. I was stunned; I was shocked, I was in the middle of a fricking daytime soap opera.

I tried to explain that it was not I who brought them to school but Beth Svanda. By then I didn’t care if I had to implicate others, I wasn’t going down for something I didn’t do.

They called sweet innocent, one time pig tailed Beth into the office where she played innocent. For some reason everyone was willing to believe that I, the outcast, would go to great lengths to bring cigarettes into school and then throw them into the trash! What the hell kind of sense did that make?

The powers that be at the Mosinee Middle School did not like my tone and as Chris and Beth were sent back to class I was sent home on a three-day suspension!

“I was framed,” I told my mother but she didn’t seem to believe me. She thought I was watching too much Knots Landing and was trying to incorporate storylines into my real life. “But it’s true, I didn’t do it.”

My father wanted to get to the bottom of the situation. He knew I didn’t take them from him as he had all his cigarettes. He didn’t smoke all that much so it was fairly easy to keep track of your pack of smokes if you only buy one at a time. Either they’re there or they’re not, and his were.

I thought, “Finally, someone believes me.”

But he wanted more proof so we got into the car and drove over to Beth Svanda’s house. I told my dad the whole story about how Beth had come to school, showed me her make up bag and pulled out the pack of cigarettes.

When we got to the house I was forced to tell the whole story again to Beth’s mother. Beth never came to the door and Beth’s mother never opened the door far enough for me to get in there and grab the bitch.

Her mother informed my father, “Beth does not have any make-up. Her mother doesn’t allow it.” This just irked me in so many ways. First, Beth did indeed have make up for I saw it and two, why was this wench talking in the third person. Was she not Beth’s mother? Was she just a really big fat imposter trying to wreak havoc on my life? Did Abby Ewing hire her to ruin me?

We left the Svanda’s in worse shape than we had come. My father no longer believed me because an adult had told him all about Beth. She didn’t have make-up, she didn’t bring a make up bag to school and she didn’t frame me.

I was put on suspension with no one in my family or anywhere else believing I was innocent. I figured, “What the heck, at least I can sit around and watch soap operas for three days.”

But my parents had other ideas for me. They decided as punishment I wasn’t going to be lounging around the house; they would put me to work. We had a wood stove in the basement that heated the whole house and we had a ton of wood for it.

This was a long ass struggle where step one was going to my grandfather’s land and cutting down the trees for the wood, then cutting the wood and piling it into the truck, then unloading the truck and piling it up in a pile outside the basement window, then throwing the wood into the basement and piling it up down there. This was a job I hated and the job they gave me when I was on suspension. Okay, I wasn’t going to the woods and all that, but I did have to take the wood from outside, throw it down into the basement and pile it up again. What a bunch of crap. Ever hear of gas heat you motherfu…

But alas I got through those three days piling wood and bitching about the injustice of it all. I realized as I worked my little digits that this was the most horrible punishment you could ever inflict onto a child. I swore, “I will never have a son that I should treat as cruelly as you have treated yours,” or was that Greg Sumner from Knots who said that. Oh yeah, it was, I decided I was taking up smoking.



THE SONGS

Like most people, my introduction to Kim Carnes’ music was the mega hit “Bette Davis Eyes.” It was one of the first 45s I ever bought and I used to play it all the time. I loved the synthesized “slaps” through out the song and used to annoy my little brother to no end by pretending to slap him as the song played.

But Kim can’t be tossed off as just a one hit wonder; no you won’t find her next to Toni Basil in the Rock & Roll Museum. Kim had hits prior to and after the “Bette Davis Eyes” she just never had as big of a hit. But that’s fairly understandable, this song was so huge repeating its success was impossible.

By the time “Bette Davis Eyes” was released in April 1981, Kim had been around for more than a decade. She sang with country bands and released a few albums in a more country folk vein that her big hit.

In 1978, her and her husband wrote the album Gideon for Kenny Rogers. It was a concept album of sorts with a cowboy theme. Kenny and Kim sang on “Don’t Fall In Love With A Dreamer” (not included on this compilation) and it became a hit.

The following year, she was the very first artist signed to EMI America Records on the insistence of the record company’s owner. Her first album on the label, St. Vincent’s Court didn’t do all that well but the following album Romance Dance spawned the top 10 hit “More Love” – a Smokey Robinson cover. Romance Dance also saw Kim moving into a more pop territory.

It was 1981’s Mistaken Identity that put Kim into the stratosphere. The album combined synthesized rock with country pop and it scored big. No doubt thanks to “Bette Davis Eyes” which was also a cover song of Jackie DeShannon’s. The original didn’t have those synthesizers in it and even the initial Kim recording didn’t have them. But after a little retooling they had the song everyone would come to know.

After the smashing success of Mistaken Identity and most notably the single, Kim’s next few albums were synthesized laden. Voyeur and Café Racers took different approaches however. Voyeur (the first full Kim album I had) was synthesized rock, while 1983’s Café Racers was dance pop, set to the tune of all those 1983 synthesizers and drum machines.

In 1985, Kim recorded Barking At Airplanes and took the helm as producer for herself. The album was a fairly big success considering the last two and she actually scored a top 20 hit with “Crazy In The Night.”

By 1986, even her minor hits were drying up, so she switched gears again and went back to her country roots. Kim is still recording and releasing records but it’s those five years on EMI America that makes up Rough Edges. They are my favorite Kim songs and they should be yours too.

I wanted to use all of Kim’s biggest hits and originally thought of doing a full singles compilation but the fact is, this is really a compilation for me to enjoy and to make for other people who aren’t familiar with Kim’s songs, but are probably fairly familiar with the singles. So I decided to do the EMI America catalog of songs I owned and loved. So the “ultimate Kim Carnes singles compilation” still eludes us, but that’s not necessarily the coolest thing to have in your collection anyway, it’s not like Rough Edges!

The 1980 hit “More Love” is the only pre- Mistaken Identity I included. I had never heard the song either by Smokey Robinson or Kim until years after this song was a hit. I wasn’t even completely mad about it, but after numerous listenings, it really has a nice little ring to it. Kim gives her all to an almost disco country beat. I have since heard the original version and I hope the Motown gods don’t strike me down, but I actually like Kim’s version better.

When “Bette Davis Eyes” came out, I found a new singer I was loved. I liked how Kim looked like Val (Joan Van Ark) from Knots Landing, I loved her scratchy voice and as I stated before I loved the slapping noises in the song. I have included “Bette Davis Eyes” on this comp as it would just seem wrong not to. The thing about the song is I always think I’m sick of it until those beats of the song begin and I immediately find myself turning the volume up, up, up. Incidentally, the same thing can be said of Blondie’s “The Tide Is High”.

Mistaken Identity sold millions but it’s a fairly strange album. Voyeur was definitely a rock-synthesized effort but Mistaken Identity is a hybrid of country pop and synthesized 80s pop – only they aren’t on the same songs. One song is country in flavor; one is full of rock guitars and keyboards. It’s strange but I like it. I never actually owned the album until years and years after its release and by then I was so entranced by Voyeur, I didn’t think she could ever top it but the big smash album does have its moments, and the album tracks I picked are much more enjoyable than the title track which was a single.

The other songs from that country/hybrid include the country flick of “Don’t Call It Love.” I really like this song and the sentiment is so sweet it almost makes my teeth fall out, but being in such a wonderful relationship as I am, it touches me… “Nobody believes that I really care for you/they don’t think my heart is true/I don’t think you’d agree/you know I’m a life time guarantee/so if they ask you what you mean to me/don’t call it love/heaven’s above/we got a better thing/don’t call it love/that ain’t enough/tell them you’re my everything.” Awww.

“Still Hold On” has always been one of my favorite songs Kim ever wrote. It’s a country rock ballad that is full of powerful lyrics and a kick ass chorus. In 1986, my country girl Tanya Tucker came back from a hiatus of dried up hits to release the album Girls Like Me, and the last song on the album was her version of “Still Hold On.” Tanya’s is just as good as this original version, and on a side note in 1979 Tanya released her Tear Me Apart album featuring the title Chinn/Chapman song, and Kim did her version of the song on her album St. Vincent’s Court. Everything is connected in my little Bradley world...

Anyway, “Still Hold On” opens with a synth (of course) and Kim chiming in, “If I told you tonight that I loved you/would you walk away/would you say/lies that I wanted to hear/if I told you tonight that I need you/would you break my heart/would you start wearing me down again..” before the acoustic guitar kicks in with back vocals adding emphasis to the chorus, “I feel so lonely when I’m with you/but I’m so lonely when you’re gone/I can’t live with you/I can’t live without you/I still hold on…” It’s a sad little number that ends up with a nice sax solo and a big chorus ending. To show how far country had warped into pop by 1986, Tanya’s version is almost identical complete with the sax and the keyboard synthesizers.

Anyone who is a real Kim Carnes fan is usually disappointed to find there are about ten official compilations none of which include all of her hits. The fan favorite is Gypsy Honeymoon, a more recent compilation that includes new songs as well, but the songs on the album from Kim’s hey day were all personally picked by Kim herself and she seems fairly fond of her ballads.

“Voyeur” is a song that comes to mind that is most often overlooked when a compilation is put out. The other song most commonly thrown away is “Draw Of The Cards” – another synthesized heavy ditty that is full of dark images and the is a fairly scary song. It was the follow up single to "Bette Davis Eyes" and hit the top 30. Once again, I recall the video and it kind of frightened me.

The song has male back up singers singing the line, “and it’s all in the draw of the cards..” and if you turn out the lights and listen to the music and the lyrics you might just scare yourself. I’ve never been completely sure what the song is about as the lyrics are fairly ambiguous, “Slight of hand/hand of fate/chance you take/life’s a snake/and it’s all in the draw of the cards.” Umm okay, Miss Carnes. For some reason, though it really captures me, and it is a fairly good representation of the early 80s synth pop.

The bridge closes with a fairly fun guitar solo and the last verse suddenly incorporates a saxophone. In fact, the last verse and through to the end of the song is what makes “Draw Of The Cards” a must have. Kim begins, “Boulevard/small café” and the sax does a little back up, “cavaliers pass the day” and more sax, “joker laughs/from the street” and that sax makes a laughing sound that is creepy and fun all at the same time, “he weaves his web/bittersweet” and the back up boy singers, “bittersweet/bittersweet/bittersweet”

Kim kicks in, “aces high/deuces low/take the first/the rest should go/and it’s all in the draw of the cards,” and those boys, “of the cards/of the cards/of the cards” with Kim chiming in with a scary little “joker” laugh, the music gets quiet and then loud, loud, the sax kicking in, loud, loud, LOUD, LOUD, SYNTHESIZER, HORNS, GUITARS, and a BIG SCARY JOKER LAUGH, before fading out. One of the most original songs to come out of this time period I think.

From Kim’s 1982 album Voyeur, I ended up using quite a few songs. “Voyeur” opens up Rough Edges and it is one of my all time favorite Kim tracks. I recall the video gained a lot of controversy as it was filled with violence and sex. Set to a synthesized rock beat, the story of the woman and her obsessions come shining through, “when voices through the thin walls/speak of abhorrent behavior/and the video’s her only savior…” Kim’s smoke filled voice adds to the eerie effect of the song, “Voyeur, voyeur/are you hot tonight? /dance dance dance/til it makes you feel good.”

The song was the opening number on the original album as well. I used to listen to that album over and over again. I loved that album, it had everything plus I loved the cover - a black and white photo of Kim in a mini skirt, jacket and high heels standing in front of some kind of factory looking building. It was so industrial, so dark. For the music inside there was rock guitars, synthesizers, keyboards, Kim’s rugged voice and some really good lyrics – plus Martha Davis of the Motels even showing up to sing along on one of the songs…

From that 1982 favorite I’ve included a few other songs including the pseudo duet with Martha – “The Arrangement.” It’s one of my favorites from that album. This track doesn’t bother using the keyboards or synthesizers of some of the others but it doesn’t go into country territory either. It’s pretty much a balls out rock song telling the tale of a very vain and selfish woman and her “arrangement” with her man. “He drives her all day long/to fancy bars and restaurants/she acts like nothings wrong/she satisfies his needs and wants/He will drive her/she will drive him crazy with demands/until he takes all he can stand" and that my friends is the arrangement.

The song has some of my favorite lines, “She believes in gold/and he believes he's lost his soul/she knows she's getting old/she's lost her vision and her goals..." What a crack up and just as good is the second verse's, "He watns a single lover/she wants a cou-cou-cou-couple more/he would like to change her life/but she does not know what for/he knows its time to leave her/she knows she broke his heart/he kind of fell in love/she kind of fell apart..."

The second single from Voyeur, was the rock ballad “Does It Make You Remember”. I’m not sure if there was a single version released or if the album version was the single. The album version is over five minutes and this is rare for a single, however listening to the song, I can’t imagine where or how they could’ve edited it down for a single version. If Kim weren’t a performer she would be (and was) a songwriter and it’s her lyrics that always affect me. If not a fan of 80s music or Kim’s voice, one would have to admit she writes some damn good stories.

“I’ve heard talk going round about you/they say you’ve taken up with someone new/they say you’re still crazy/but I’m still crazy bout you/and do you remember? /the heart amused/or the heart abused/when it’s all said and done/you know what I’d choose/so why did you run to her/is she just an excuse/to help you remember/make you forget?” I love it. Kim can be so soulful and even without the 80s rock sound, this could probably be done as a country song and be just as powerful.

My favorite song from Voyeur has always been “Looker.” It’s a song written by outside writers but it could’ve been one of Kim’s. Heavily laden synthesizers start out the song with Kim singing, “A pretty face reflected in a mirror/so perfect in every way/with every move the picture’s getting clearer/she’s got it all/she’s got it made,” and more synthesizers come in “when she smiles/is she really smiling/she’s the only one who really knows/but in the night/I hear a young girl crying/emerald eyes so cool and so inviting/hide the side/she never shows” then the drums and guitars kick in, “She’s a Looker/that’s what they say/she’s got it all/ yeah she’s got it made/she’s a Looker/ with a beautiful face/always on display.” I can totally relate to this song as I too am quite a looker and it’s not so easy being pretty!

The kick to this little comp is including my favorite Kim songs that were just album cuts and probably never thought about. One of the all time best lyrics Kim ever wrote occurs in “Take It On The Chin” from Voyeur. The song is pretty simplistic, incorporating the mandatory Voyeur synths and some guitar but Kim is full of acid in this one while singing in a slightly higher register than normal, “you’re looking right/you’re walking tiiight/you think everybody wants you/cause you can do it all night..” I love it, and it was quite scandalous to me when I was a kid. Now I know exaclty where Kim is coming from. The song continues on as Kim tells her deadbeat man that she is through “don’t think you heard me the first time/goodbye goodbye goodbye/is it a shock to you/that I’m not standing in line?/well take it one the chin baby/if you’re tough enough.”

In the fall of 1982, a little movie known as Flashdance took the world and this little Bradley by storm. It was the first R rated movie I ever got to see. I could not stop talking about, whining and crying until my mother could take no more and brought me to the theater.

I don’t know why parents are always so uptight about what their kids see because I didn’t understand half of the crap going on in it. The jokes and all the drama went right over my head. Of course I could figure out the boob-flashing scene, but it was the music I loved the most. Years later, it would be Jennifer Beals taking her shoe off and massaging her dinner date’s penis with her foot under the table that became my favorite part, but that’s what happens when you grow up.

Anyway, Kim contributed to the soundtrack with her ballad, “I’ll Be Here Where The Heart Is.” To this day, it’s still one of my favorite songs, not just by Kim, and not just from the soundtrack but in general. Like I’ve said, Kim has a very clever of writing a lyric, then with her scratchy voice, I somehow am able to empathize with whatever she’s saying.

Set to that big synthesizer sound she was doing at the time, the song begins, “it’s the song that just keeps playing on the radio/and you know I haven’t seen you for awhile/I lie awake at night and wonder how you are/and I wish I could see you again…” then the drum rolls and a great guitar lick that will run through the rest of the song, “Is it fate or is it luck that brings us back/or is it just a common point of view/time has put on a spell on you that never seems to change/and I wish I could see you again…” to the chorus:

“I’ll be here where the heart is/where the dreams that we’ve been after all come true/you will find me here where the heart is/I’ll wait for you/I’ll wait for you…” Sure, it’s sentimental slop to some, but the song always puts me into a mood. I feel like crying when I hear it and wonder where I put that Prozac.

“I’ll Be Here Where The Heart Is” was never released as a single but Kim did put in on her next album, 1983’s Café Racers, and it was the B-side to that albums first single Invisible Hands.

For Café Racers, Kim hired Keith Olsen (Pat Benatar, Fleetwood Mac, and co-producer of the soundtrack to that flashy trashy strip movie we were just talking about) to produce and they came up with something she had never done before. A full blown synthesized dance oriented album. Full of drum machines, fake guitars, and Kim’s vocals…it’s not as bad as you would think.

There are a few highlights from the album including “Invisible Hands.” Sounding like a hybrid of Olivia Newton-John’s “Twist Of Fate” and Madonna’s “Burning Up”, the song might as well have “1983” as a subtitle. Needless to say I love it.

Opening with a faint “aaaah” backing vocal, Kim comes in more hoarse than normal and the backing vocals added to the chorus, “Reaching out my Invisible Hands to touch you/Aaaah reaching out my Invisible Hands to free you.” Again, the lyrics are that 1980s “what are they really talking about?” type, “You make the evening news/you never had an alibi/your evidence may be the truth/but they won’t read my lies..” What? Okay reach out your invisible hands then.

The only thing I like in a song better than a bridge is what I call a “breakdown” where most of the music drops away and there is a line from the song repeated(usually the bridge or chorus). Pat Benatar does it a lot, Swivek did it on “Spastic Valentino” and Kim does it on this song with the bridge “Is it a lie when you’re asking me why? /is it a lie when you’re asking me why?”

The first time the bridge appears, we hear it and then a chorus repeat with a synth solo that sounds like it came from a Human League song, then her “breakdown." Oh how I love this song! Kim took the song to #40 on the pop charts; meanwhile Olivia hit #3 with “Twist Of Fate” and Madonna was yet to “conquer the world.”

“You Make My Heart Beat Faster (And That’s All That Matters)” was the long-winded second single from Café Racers. Done in a very similar vein as “Invisible Hands” it’s a fun little piece of synth pop, but nowhere near as enjoyable as the first single.

I love “story songs” and “Young Love” happens to be the one chosen here. You know the type of songs I’m talking about, Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ On A Prayer” comes to mind with its story of the guitar player and his girlfriend. Usually these stories involve a guy named Johnny or John. I’m not sure why but that’s the way it is – perhaps there’s an unwritten law in pop music that says you have to use Johnny as your protagonist in story songs.

John shows up in “Young Love”, “Jenny loves John/ but he doesn’t care/ Now that he loves another/I know he’s been getting his share/sometimes I want to tell her/but I wouldn’t dare/cause tonight when she calls/she won’t know that I’m there…” That’s right, Kim is a slutting ho sleeping with her friend Jenny’s boyfriend John! I love it. The song would’ve been better if someone got killed at the end but I guess that’s Tanya Tucker’s department, not Kim’s.

The final single chosen from Café Racers was “I Pretend.” The song only hit in the upper 70s of the top 100 but it’s totally Kim Carnes. In fact it probably fits better on Mistaken Identity or one of her more recent albums than it did on the Café album.

I had to exclude a song from Barking At Airplanes (“One Kiss”) in order to include this song but I felt I had to include it since it did actually chart and once again I like the sentiment of the song.

Set to a contemporary adult radio beat, “I Pretend” is all about Kim’s obsession with her ex, “I still wish I was there was with you/she’s got the man I can never have…” But Kim has found a way to get through those nights of heartbreak; “How it hurts to be second best/ooh let me tell you what I have to do/to get through the night/I pretend that you love me after dark/pretend that you’re holding me next to your heart/pretend that you wanted me right from the start/ooo I’m lost in the fantasy/I pretend that you’re valentine is for me/pretend I’m the only one that you need/pretend that we’re making love in my dreams/ooo I’m lost in the fantasy.” How tragic, yet how many of us have been there? Well not me of course, but how many of you?

Kim hadn’t had a bona fide hit in a few years when she decided to take over as her own producer for her next album. 1985’s Barking At Airplanes came out in the summer, and I remember hearing the first single “Crazy In The Night (Barking At Airplanes)” on the radio. I loved it and so did others as it hit #15 on the pop charts giving Kim another hit.

Starting with footsteps banging up stairs and a knock on the door, a small child whispers, “Who’s there?” before the synthesizers kick in and Kim and her B-Boys (Background vocals) sing the chorus, “Sometimes I really think I’m going Crazy In The Night/When I hide under the covers/and I won’t turn out the light/I think nothing’s gonna get to me/but then again it might/what can I do to keep from Crazy In The Night?”

In an interesting diversion from typical pop formula, the first verse continues as just the synthesized keyboard loop with only one little drum beat added, “I need a drink of water/but I swallow hard instead/it’s hard to move a muscle when you’re frozen in your bed/if I could make it to the phone before I die of fright/what can I do to keep from going Crazy In The Night.”

Then the chorus kicks in but it’s not Kim singing it, it has those B boys all over it while the guitar and drums kick, “sometimes she really thinks she’s going crazy in the night…” with a bunch of high pitched, “doo doo doo doos” in the background. It’s infectious. It also reminds me of my Grandmother Ferlie, who swore she too was going crazy in the night working the night shift at the post office.

If Voyeur was my favorite Kim album to this point, Barking At Airplanes had the makings of taking over the title. All of the songs were either clever little ballads that pulled at my heartstrings or synthesized pop confections like “Crazy In The Night.”

The best ballad Kim has ever done in my opinion is the title track to this compilation, “Rough Edges.” The music is very minimalist and the song is mostly just Kim singing her misery but it’s so chilling, leaving me awestruck every time I hear it. For some reason, it’s the song I turn on every time I break up with some bastard.

Chosen as the third single from Barking At Airplanes, the song never had a chance on the radio, but Kim performed it around the TV circuit and I caught a live performance on some award show and I immediately fell in love with it.

Beginning in a similar vein to Cyndi Lauper’s “True Colors”, there’s a bongo playing and then some clever guitar loops for Kim to come in, “We learn to hold it in/hide our hearts/don’t let it show/so scared we forget to say/all the words when we need them most/rough edges take time/understanding/never losing/our rough edges/take time/holding on/and I still want you…”

My favorite verse is the next one, “sometimes people change/sometimes I don’t know you/it runs by/ we stumble through/ round and round/ cause we know our/ rough edges…” It’s so pretty and thought provoking. I mean who doesn’t have their own rough edges? The song fades out with “na na na’s” and guest vocalists singing their little “aahs” and “da da das.”

“Rough Edges” came out about six months before Cyndi’s “True Colors” and this song really should’ve been just as popular as Cyndi’s ballad.

The second single from Barking was the synth laden “Abadabadango”. Abadaba what o? I know, it sounds silly and it is silly but like “Crazy In The Night” which isn’t exactly poetry, this song is fun. And it’s done for fun’s sake.

The song begins almost identical to “Crazy” with synthesizers and the chorus. Using the silly word as a metaphor of sorts for love and all it’s mystical powers. The lyrics begin, “Abadabadango/can you hear/it’s the rhythm of the heart/that beats for a million years,” and the verse begins, “We all have to use some kind of magic some of the time/between the laughter and the tears/a place to draw the line/when you say that you can’t/say that you won’t/so don’t even give it a try/when the heart as it seems/to take all the dreams/and give it just one more try…” and the chorus with an added line, “Abadabadango/getting loud and clear/if you listen close/to the voice inside that you wait to hear.”

If I were to analyze this song, I would say "abadabadango" is the moment when you hear that inner voice telling you how stupid you’ve been acting, how you need to realize what you have right in front of you. But I’m not Kim Carnes so what the hell do I know about abadabadango?

“Divided Hearts” is the final song of Kim’s EMI America catalog chosen for Rough Edges. The song comes from Kim’s 1986 album Lighthouse. The album went back to Mistaken Identity territory, not only in musical styles (mixing country pop with rock pop) but also reuniting Kim with producer Val Garay. It would be her last EMI album and her last contemporary pop album. But what a way to go.

I remember seeing her perform “Divided Hearts” on Johnny Carson and I loved it. I had to run out and get it. Unfortunately there was other music more important and I never did buy the Lighthouse album or the single.

Years of searching finally got the song into my hot little hands and I was ecstatic. It really is one of my all time favorite Kim Carnes tracks.

As much as I love “Rough Edges” I think “Divided Hearts” is the close runner up to being my favorite in Kim’s ballad type of songs. The song itself is actually very close to being a clone of “Rough Edges” but hey if you’ve got a formula that works for you, you might as well stick with it.

Working not so much as a ballad as a soft rock confection, there is a guitar riff running quietly through the song and endless background vocals chime in behind her and the drum machine.

“You look out of your window/into the neon light/you try to forget him/but the feeling keeps you up all night/flashback/flashback/flashback/it comes from the abstract mind”

“One, divided heart/two, divided hearts/why do they break? /we watch them fall to pieces on the ground/one, divided heart/two, divided hearts/why do they break? /and we are left with our divided hearts/oh…”

“Standing conversation/down at the pink café/you telling me you’ve got reasons/but I just can’t hear a single word you say…”

The best part of the song is almost every line is repeated or sung along with back up vocalists in almost choir like atmosphere. It really is a clever little ballad and one of my favs.

So now you know the songs and stories of that smoky voiced Kim Carnes. Perhaps you too can share some of her rough edges and see beyond those Bette Davis Eyes. It’s all in the draw of the cards, but choosing Kim will give you an ace every time.

posted by swivek @ 9:16 AM 3 comments

Today's Bubbatune - Pat Benatar

There has been a war waging inside my head since I was a little tyke. Who do I like better, Pat Benatar or Deborah Harry? Who will reign supreme as the rock and roll queen? The first record I ever got was Blondie’s Parallel Lines and then the second was Pat’s In The Heat Of The Night. I don’t think there are any albums I’ve listened to more in all these years. I have found through my constant, “Who is better? Who do I love?” struggle, that whoever I am playing at the time takes the cake as my favorite, so with this compilation, Pat Benatar’s The Singles 1979-1981 it looks like Pat Benatar is my favorite singer EVER – today.

PAT BENATAR – THE SINGLES 1979-1981 (bub03)
Album design by Bradley Jacobson

Track List:
1. I Need A Lover (a Side)
2. Rated X (b side)
3. If You Think You Know How To Love Me (a side)
4. So Sincere (b side)
5. Heartbreaker (a side)
6. My Clone Sleeps Alone (b side)
7. We Live For Love
8. You Better Run (a side)
9. Out-A-Touch (b side)
10. Hit Me With Your Best Shot (a side)
11. Prisoner Of Love (b side)
12. Treat Me Right (a side)
13. Never Wanna Leave You (US b side)
14. Hell Is For Children (UK b side)
15. Fire And Ice (a side)
16. Hard To Believe (b side)
17. Promises In The Dark (a side)
18. Evil Genius (b side)

THE STORY
There are so many stories that involve a certain blonde boy named Brad and a spandex inclined wearing diva known as Pat Benatar. Our lives were first entwined when my Aunt Carol came trotting on into our house one night carrying a record album. (For those who don’t know - prior to cassette or Compact Disc, there were these 12” cylinder things made of wax, we would put them on a “record player” and music would come through the speakers. They are often referred to as “records”, “12””, “vinyl” or “LP”… there were also 7” records called “45”s.. this will come in handy later.)

The record Aunt Carol was clutching was In The Heat Of The Night by some chick named Pat Benatar. I had never heard of her but the picture on the cover certainly had me intrigued. Carol told me she had ordered it from Columbia House and they had sent her two and she figured I would like it since I liked that Blondie chick.

So my cousin Paula and I ran up to my blue and white Snoopy stereo and put this Pat Benatar on. The first beat of “Heartbreaker” hit and I realized the song seemed familiar to me. After listening to the intensity of the first side and falling in love with this woman, we played side two which started out with “We Live For Love” – another song I was somewhat familiar with from our radio. I was in Heaven, this chick rocked and she was going right next to my Blondie album.

A few months later my pal Bobby Hallas (yes, I once hung out with boys) came over with his brand new 45, Pat Benatar’s “Hit Me With Your Best Shot.” I was thrilled with it. I couldn’t get enough and wanted my own copy of the single. I asked my mother why it was that everyone in the world seemed to have everything and I couldn’t have anything. It was an ongoing struggle I had with her.

One day we went to Prange Way, a generic little department store before the days of Target or Wal Mart. We went in and as my mother disappeared to try on endless outfits made of polyester, I hit the music department. I was bound and determined to get my hands on the new Pat Benatar album. I figured if I clutched it tight enough I could own it. My mother was in a particularly good mood that day so I knew I could get the record if I asked nicely enough. But there was drama about to brew at the Prange Way.

As I entered the music department I searched and searched and could not find the Pat Benatar album Crimes Of Passion. They had In The Heat Of The Night, but I already had that. I was ticked off beyond belief. I asked to speak to a manager immediately for I couldn’t believe that someone would run a business in this manner.

The manager informed me that they did have a number of copies but they had sold out. They did have the cassette and the 8 track. Well I had never heard of this crazy cassette thing and my mother did have an 8 track player in her old Chevy, so maybe this was fate stepping in. With an 8 track I could listen to the album everywhere I went. What a brilliant idea!

I thanked the manager, ran to the information booth declaring I was a lost child so my mother would emerge from the dressing room and we were on our way to the checkout.

All that spring, Bobby Hallas would come over to my house and we would play my 8track as I acted out every song pretending I was Pat Benatar. I dubbed Bobby, “Neil Geraldo” that spring just so he wouldn’t feel left out.

Somewhere around this time, my mother and father had a fight and Karen decided she was an abused wife. Now there's two weird things about this story (just two?) 1) I don't remember my parents fighting that particular day so I think Karen was just watching Phil Donahue and decided she was abused and 2) normally when my Mom was mad at Big Jim Daddy we would go to my Nauntie Dianne's, but I think this time Dianne was taking a sabbatical at Toots and Jim's bar in Merrill, WI. so she was unavailable for comment.

So my mother decides to call this 1-800 number where they will hook up abused wives with some other woman who will put you up for the night to get away from your stinking man. So my mother packed up a laundry basket full of clothes and we trotted out the door of our abusive surroundings.

This really had no effect on me apparently because I remember as soon as we got to the woman's house I propped my butt down in front of the TV. Wizard of Oz was on so it must've been around Easter time because they used to show that movie every year around that time, and then at 10:30 Fridays was on. Fridays was essentially a Saturday Night Live rip off though I always thought it seemed a little more hip. These days some of those actors actually amounted to something including Michael Richards (Kramer – Seinfeld), Larry David (Curb Your Enthusiasm – creator Seinfeld) and Melanie Chartoff.

Anyway, this particular Friday, the Friday my mother became an abused wife was also the Friday Little Miss Benatar was the musical guest on Fridays. Apparently being a child from a broken home had its advantages cause I got to stay up to watch it.

I was so excited, I remember my mother telling this lady that I just loved Pat Benatar. So Patty Patty came on in all of her leather pant and red fringed glory. Her Pat Benatar eye makeup all-fabulous. She belted out "You Better Run" while I paraded around all sultry and hard ass as only an effeminate young boy can do. Then she sang her child abuse anthem "Hell Is For Children." That's when I decided I was an abused child. I immediately went to talk to our hostess to find out what my 1-800 number was.

The apple falls far from the tree for the Jacobsons.

That summer, one more spectacular thing happened to me. I was at the Mosinee Municipal Pool swimming my little heart away. Actually, I was at the shallow end of the pool because no one had ever bothered to teach me how to swim.

So as I lounged around holding my cocktail in the shallow end, the radio was playing in the background. WIFC 95.5 FM, the coolest rock station in Wausau Wisconsin and all the nearby communities. The announcer said, “And now the new Pat Benatar,” and out poured “Fire And Ice.” It was the debut of the new single and it was almost like it was dedicated to me!

I knew it was fate that I happened to be lounging around near the radio that day. Otherwise who knew when I would’ve heard about this new song. No one ever kept me informed of such things.

At the time, I was bound and determined to learn how to swim. I wanted to be cool and jump off the diving boards like all those hot teenage boys I saw. But without the ability to swim to the other end of the pool it didn’t seem possible. So instead I learned the best way to be cool and swim in the deep end of the pool was to jump off the edge, turn mid air and grab the side of the pool before plunging into the depths and drowning.

My mother and the life guards were apparently not too aware of this little trick or I’m sure the horrible incident that happened would’ve been nipped in the water logged bud.

As it was, no one knew what I had been up to or that I had perfected this little trick. So it was my big debut to show my mother the newest thing her multi talented little boy could do.

I yelled to her, “Look Ma! I can swim in the deep end.” I jumped off the ledge, I turned mid air, my mouth came crashing down on the edge of the pool shoving my bottom teeth practically through my chin. There was blood and screams and fast reactions and my utter embarrassment that my big debut did not go as planned.

After that, my mother took me to swimming lessons and it only took two lessons and I was swimming harder and faster than any of those 3 year olds in the class. Since that summer, I became a very good swimmer; I was even on the high school swim team for about two seconds.

I still have a little scar from that swimming debacle but even better; I still have all the Pat Benatar memories and songs to go along with it.



THE SONGS
Now you know how I discovered each of Pat’s first three albums. Those albums – In The Heat Of The Night, Crimes Of Passion and Precious Time are what spawned the songs that make up The Singles 1979-1981.

There are a number of Pat comps out there that usually include most of the songs here, but I wanted a full on singles compilation. The problem with that is Pat has had about 32 singles and that just doesn’t fit on one disc. Plus like most of the other people who I have made comps on, there are so many great songs that aren’t singles, and in Pat’s case some of my favorite songs from those albums ended up as the B-sides to the singles. So with that in mind, I began putting together a compilation that would include the A side and B-side of the single. I figured since I would already have to make multiple discs I might as well make them interesting. So in all there are four of the Pat Benatar The Singles compilations – this one, 1982-1985, 1985-1989 and 1993-2003. This is, of course the first.

“I Need A Lover” was the very first single ever released by our Patty Patty. It’s a John Cougar song and he actually released it at about the same time as she did. It’s so strange to think I used to sing along with this song and had absolutely no idea what it was about or even what she was saying in the verses. Thankfully, I grew up and now really understand the song; “I Need A Lover that won’t drive me crazy/someone who knows the meaning of ‘Hey hit the highway’”. Pat apparently loved the song as it was something a woman wouldn’t normally sing and it definitely had the hard-edged attitude she was trying to get across.

“I’ve been walking the streets in the evening/racing through this human jungle at night/I’m so confused my mind is indifferent/hey I’m so weak won’t someone shut off the lights/electricity comes through the video/I watch it from this hole I call home…”

The imagery of the song and of the whole In The Heat Of The Night album is that of deep dark sultry city nights where love or a hot stranger is right around the corner. I loved it! I wanted to live in that little apartment shown on the album cover. Incidentally, it was actually Pat’s apartment at the time. Who knew?

The great thing about making The Singles 1979-1981 is being able to hear the B-sides along with the singles. It feels like a night of sipping wine and playing 45s only I don’t have to get off my fat ass to turn the records over.

One of my all time favorite songs on In The Heat Of The Night is “Rated X” and that was the B-side chosen for “I Need A Lover.” The combo is one kicking debut single. “Rated X” is a cover of Nick (“Hot Child In The City”) Gilder. Nick had the ability to turn in some of the most sexually blatant new wave of the late 1970s. The song is all about a porn star and her quest for some real loving and Pat’s delivery is great. The song changes pace in the middle as Pat screams, “She wakes up and breaks up/and wonders why love is unkind/she wakes up and makes up/and looks in the mirror to find…” but it’s that killer chorus that sticks to you, “Drinking champagne is a pastime/ making hot love is the main line/money buys love and a white tie/drinking champagne is a past time.”

The second single chosen was the very smoky Smokie cover, “If You Think You Know How To Love Me” written by Mike Chapman and Nicky Chinn, it was the Chinnichap Team personified. Dark imagery of passionate nights spent on a beach and the endless search for someone who can really love you. Pat uses her best scratch voice to create a whole world in just a few lines, “Breathless strut on the downtown street/motor bike ride in the midday heat/the dust that hung from the depth sky/run, though we’d run/it still burned our eyes.” The chorus is just as long in length as the verses (and title) as Pat leads up to “If you think you know how to love me/and you think you know what I need/and if you really really want me to stay/you’ve got to lead the way.”

My favorite lines occur in the second verse, “We spent the night in a nameless town/then we moved out of sight with a silent sound/the beach that wept the deserted waves/that’s where we slept/knowing we’d be safe/now you may think you can walk on the wild, wild side with me…” and my favorite, “but there’s a lot I’ve learned/and there’s a lot I’ve yet to see.” This song never even cracked the top 100, but it has some real power behind it. When the chorus hits and the cymbals crack on every other note, I am transported to that deserted beach.

For the bside, “So Sincere” was chosen. It’s one of only two songs on the debut album co-written by Pat Benatar and it is my ultimate favorite song on the whole thing. The song begins with this wild new wave guitar repeat before the keyboards kick in and the drums hit, “You say I love you and we’re so sincere/I look in your eyes and it becomes quite clear/you want what I want/you need what I need/when I turn to leave/you bleed and bleed and bleed and bleed.” It is so powerful and so catchy.

Again my favorite lines come in the second verse, “we’re living so fast/we’re not living at all/two sparrows tied together/will always fall/we know we love each other/so there’s nothing to prove/but I’m going to smother/ if somebody don’t move.” Love it!

In very exciting news, my pal Louis from Tiki Lab who did a bang up job of remixing “Debbie Doesn’t” has written music for a “So Sincere” cover so hold onto to your wigs and keys cuz a Swivek version is just around the corner.

Finally, the single that broke our girl into the mainstream. Da da da da da da da da bom bom, that’s my interpretation of the thunderous beginning to “Heartbreaker.” What can be said about this song, other than “sheer brilliance.” One of Pat’s signature tunes, I had never heard a woman sing like this before. Bellowing, screaming, singing notes never heard on rock radio. In fact, radio didn’t want to play it saying it was too “hardcore”. Can you imagine?

“My Clone Sleeps Alone” is one of those uber fantastic songs that could’ve only happened in the late 70s or early 80s. Crazy lyrics and crazy theme but excellent tune. The song begins as a piano ballad and Pat’s high octave, “You know and I know my clone sleeps alone/she’s out on her own forever…” You’re left thinking, “What?” but I guess at the time cloning was in the news. The song ends up with hilarious lyrics like, “No VD, no cancer/on TV’s the answer/no father, no mother/she’s just like the other/no loud cloned ladies allowed in the 80s/no bad names/no sex games/just clone names and clone games/and you know and I know/my clone sleeps alone.” Can you even imagine? Pat has said this is the very first song she ever wrote… now there’s something I’d kill to have on MY resume.

“We Live For Love” is another classic that was released as a single. The song has been accused of being a Blondie clone but besides the “aaah” backing vocals, I don’t notice it all that much. It is very new wave as Blondie was doing at the time, and it’s a little less rock than you would imagine Pat would be doing but it’s downright catchy. Perhaps with Mike Chapman and Peter Coleman (who worked with Blondie) creating the backdrop for the album, there was bound to be some comparisons.

When you hear “Rated X”, “My Clone Sleeps Alone” and “We Live For Love” you can easily recognize the debut album wasn’t the hard rock that Pat would be known for. It’s more new wave rock but Pat was going to cultivate the rock and roll album the next time around. (Note: The B-side to “We Live For Love” was “So Sincere.”)

The first single from Crimes Of Passion, was Pat’s version of the Rascal’s “You Better Run.” This song is the Pat Benatar image personified - killer guitar licks, feisty attitude, “You Better Run, you better hide, you better leave from my sight..” It was the second video ever to be played on MTV and in the video Pat is her pissed off, short boy haircut, 80s stripe wearing, leather pant loving best.

The flip side of “You Better Run” is one of my all time favorite songs by Pat ever… “Out-A-Touch.” On Crimes, Pat wrote more than she had on the previous album and this is one of the songs she co-wrote. It is so sublime in its lyrical kiss off. The music blends together the best of both of her albums, the chord changes and drama are very new wave while the guitar solos and drum rolls are rock and roll. Pat changes keys and chords so often it could’ve ended up a big mess but instead it’s ferocious and fun.

“I’ve seen your picture in the paper/on the front page of magazines/I pull the trigger right at you on billboards and movie screens…” Again, it ends up having some corny lyrics but I think in 1980, it was the coolest thing in the world, “Can’t you see I’m obsessed/I do anything/I’m obsessed/I’m in a constant rage/ an illuminary stage/I need you…” and the ultimate, “When I look it’s in your eyes/and I know you’re looking from hypnotize/how long does it have to last like this?/the kodachrome kiss?”

The ending of the song has Pat chanting, “I need you, I need you,” raising an octave with each plea until the drum kicks its last beat and Neil strums his last guitar lick, and Pat’s echoed voice is left hanging, “I need you…” It was the last song on the album and a perfect way to end it.

The second single from Crimes Of Passion was the song that pushed the world into full on Benatar mode. “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” has been on the radio since its debut in October 1980. “You’re a real tough cookie with a long history/of breaking little hearts like the one in me…” If “You Better Run” didn’t solidify Benatar’s image as a hard ass bitch, then this was the song that was definitely going to do it. It was her first gold single, her first top 10 hit and it sent Crimes Of Passion into multi platinum status.

The song most people hear isn’t all that hard edged, but the single version has a different guitar intro than the album version. I hadn’t really noticed since I didn’t listen to the 45 since I was a little kid, but every single version of the song that’s ever been on any compilation is the album version. I recently bought the UK version of Best Shots (Pat’s first greatest hits collection) and they included the single version, which is so much tougher.

It is also the version I used to perform at my Nauntie Dianne’s house. But that’s another story….

The B-side to that 45 Bobby Hallas brought over all those years ago, is a fun little pop confection called “Prisoner Of Love.” The song was written by Scott Sheets, the second guitarist in the Benatar camp. The lyrics are all in accordance to match up with the title, there’s images of jails, chains etc. all incorporating the prisoner theme. But it’s a very catchy little number and probably one of Pat’s more overlooked songs. I always liked it, unfortunately on my 8-track it was the song that would fade out in the middle and then pick up on the next channel .. (I know some of you have no friggin clue as to what I’m talking about, you’re better off.)

“Cold hard labor/it’s the labor of love/convicted of crimes, crimes of passion/caught in a chain gang/the chain of fools/solitary confinement/confined by the rules..” to the chorus, “I’m just a prisoner/an inmate of love/oh I’m a prisoner/captured by love/with no escape/no where to go/no place to hide/hey, I’m a prisoner/I’m just a prisoner.”

The images continue through the next verse and chorus into a pretty killer guitar solo and onto my favorite verse of all (the third), “find an escape/a key to the door/gotta get out/can’t take anymore/make a clean break/to bury the past/I’ll shed these chains/and be free at last/I’m just a prisoner/a prisoner of love/hey I’m a prisoner!”

The final single from Crimes Of Passion is the very first song from the album, the kick you to the curb “Treat Me Right”. It’s another Benatar co-written song and it’s another of those “don’t mess with me” songs she was so apt to do at this time. It has some of the best beats and best lines of all the songs on Crimes Of Passion.

“You want me to leave/you want me to stay/you ask me to come back/you turn and walk away…” Pat declares she’s no martyr and she’s no saint but if you know what’s good for you, you will treat her right. The coolest part of this song is the guitar solo which starts at the exact note Pat sings and goes from there. Apparently this is the first song where Neil took that idea and went with it. For some reason, it’s very remarkable to me.

The UK and the US released different b-sides for the “Treat Me Right” single. Here we got the Neil Geraldo/Pat Benatar penned “Never Wanna Leave You” which is an excellent little foray into new wave rock. The jittering guitar through out the song as Pat sings in her high octave is excellent, “never could say what I wanna say/never could do what I wanna do/never could believe you/if it’s true/never would/never could you make it so hard/I never wanna leave you…” and then the song has a bridge. I love bridges and I think I learned to love them by listening to Pat’s songs as she usually has some killer ones thrown in.

In “Never Wanna Leave You” she lowers her register and I’m finally able to sing along with her, “Move in together/coming apart/you’re what I need/I’m what you want/never could refuse you from the start/never could/never would/never could you make it so hard…”

The song ends with Pat echoing “Never wanna leave you, never wanna leeeeave you, never wanna” and a winding guitar through to the end which sounds like someone just turned off the tape. In fact when I heard this song on my 8 track I was sure I had got a bum version. That is until Bobby Hallas informed me his vinyl copy ended the same way.

The UK put “Hell Is For Children” as the Bside to “Treat Me Right” which is probably good as it’s one of Pat’s most famous songs and I was then able to put it on this singles collection. Personally, I’m a tad sick of hearing the song but that’s only because I’m a Pat nut who can’t go three days without listening to one of her CDs, and this song is everywhere. If it’s not a live version, then it’s the recorded version or she’s performing it somewhere on television.

The song is about child abuse and the title was actually the title of an article bassist Roger Capps was reading describing the child abuse situation in the US. This was 1980 and the whole abuse thing wasn’t really talked about and no one seemed to be aware of the real problem. Pat and Roger wrote out the lyrics while Neil came up with a pretty haunting melody that breaks into a full on rage by the end of the song with Pat screaming, “Hell is for Hell! Hell Is For Children!” To this day, it’s still a pretty chilling number and one Pat performs every single time she performs.

Then the summer of ’81 hit with the album Precious Time. The first single, that single that made me bite into my lower chin and cause unnecessarily damage was “Fire And Ice.” The first thing you notice is the song has a different feel than any of the singles that came before it. The whole Precious Time album actually has a different feel. Where In The Heat Of The Night was steamy and dark, it had a certain airiness to it; Crimes Of Passion was full of hard guitar riffs but was filled with enough pop hooks to breeze by rather fast. Precious Time on the other hand was dark and dirty.

Featuring a cover of “Helter Skelter” and a 6 minute title track, the guitars were grungier, the drums heavier and the lyrics darker.

By now you’re all thinking, but “Fire And Ice” isn’t so dark.. and that’s true. It’s also the one song Chrysalis Records insisted Pat put on the album. Apparently our girl was never too fond of the lyric, “ooo you’re giving me the fever tonight/I don’t want to give in I’d be playing with fire..” but the record company knew a single when they heard one and so there you have it.

The flip side to “Fire And Ice” blew me out of the water (blood soaked and all that it was)when I first heard it. Pat had never really done anything like “Hard To Believe” before. It had remnants of “Never Wanna Leave You” with melody changes and all but there was something different about it. I didn’t know what to think when I first heard it. But now it is one of my all time favorite tracks Benatar has ever done.

The first co-writing partnership for Neil Geraldo and drummer Myron Grombacher, it’s filled with breezy lyrics, “Yesterday’s a by line/words upon a page/tomorrow is a deadline/sudden and it’s strange” and then changes melody pumping hard rock, “Hard to believe you ever could leave but you did/hard to believe you ever could leave” then back to breeze, “Nowhere to go/can’t sit still/look for motive/ in the time that I kill/thinking of ways/to fill up my empty days/to fill up my empty days” and then a third change as the music becomes a mellow drum and guitar roll, “Hard to believe/you’d leave when I need you/I need you so/it’s Hard to Believe…” and the whole thing begins again, with an ending rolling those drums and Pat’s “Hard to believe/you’d leave when I need you/I need you so/Hard to believe” and the music gets harder and harder until it ends in the same way as “Never Wanna Leave You”, a guitar left mid-air wondering what happened to the song it was playing in.

Then it’s onto my ultimate favorite single Pat has done; “Promises In The Dark.” This song being my favorite was not always the case. In fact, like I said I found Precious Time to be a little less than a worthy successor to the brilliance of In The Heat Of The Night or Crimes Of Passion (which I had dubbed as the closest thing to Heaven you would ever find down here on Earth).

The song seemed so long to me in my little brain. Clocking in at 4:48 it is a five minute single which wasn’t too popular at the time. Most songs at 3:30 are a little long winded for radio, but by this time Pat could do what she wanted.

“Promises In The Dark” starts with Pat singing over a piano and quiet guitar swirl, “Never again/isn’t that what you said/you’ve been through this before/and you swore this time/ you’d think with your head/No one would ever have you again/and if taking was going to be done/you’d decide where and when/just when you think you’ve got it down/your heart securely tied and bound/they whisper promises in the …. And the guitars and drums kick in as Pat sings, “daaaarrkkk…”

The second verse is done in the same melody but it’s now a balls out rocker with Pat growling the same thing she just whispered about. And then it’s the bridge.. oh the bridge, where the band switches melody, Pat switches keys and keeps getting higher and higher then growls, then sings high and then growls, and then high, high, high until only dogs and Mariah Carey could hear her…

“But promises you know what they’re for/they sound so convincing but you’ve heard them before/talk is cheap/and you gotta be sure/and so you put up your guard/and you try to be hard/but your heart says tryyyyy agaaaaaaaaaaaaiiinn…” as it fades into one kick ass rock and roll guitar solo.

The final verse is filled with anger and passion and sends me into a flurry ever time I sing it, I mean hear Pat sing it, “You desperately search for a way to conquer the fear/but no line of attack has been planned to fight back the tears/where brave and restless dreams are both won and lost/on the edge is where it seems it’s well worth the cost/just when you think you’ve got it down/your heart’s in pieces on the ground/they whisper promises in theeeeee….” And the whole thing goes silent… until Neil yells, “1,2,3,4” and Pat hits octaves only a pro like she could, “daaaaarrrkk…” before another killer break out guitar solo and a drum roll ending. It’s truly one of her hardest rocking songs and now that I’m older and can relate to the shit bag she’s singing about, I am in love with the song.

In real life, the shit bag in the song is Neil and was written at a time of turbulence between the two, but to me it represents just about every shit bag I've ever known. Isn't that just a dainty little term. Anyway, "Promises" was originally intended to be a ballad the whole way through but apparently anger overcame and it became the powerhouse it is. A side note should also be mentioned that Pat, still sketchy about her own writing, slipped the lyrics to this song under the bedroom door for Neil to read.

The Singles 1979-1981 ends with the strange little ditty known as “Evil Genius.” The B-side to “Promises In The Dark” it’s the tale of an evil little genius who takes a gun and murders someone. I recall seeing an interview of Pat around the time she was recording this album and they were saying the new album was going to be called “Evil Genius.” It’s probably best this song is only an album/b-side cut and didn’t become an actual album title thus reminding everyone of its existence.

The song begins with Pat singing to a quiet keyboard, “They were so ecstatic when the letter arrived/a certified genius at the age of 5/they planned his future so carefully/he was everything they’d hoped he’d be…”

The drums and guitars kick in as Pat tells the story of this boy genius that lived his life in a “video fantasy” until that day when he went into hiding “cause there’s fingerprints on the gun.” The guitars churn up and Pat goes from growl to high octave in each line, “Why’d you have to do it Evil Genius/was it justified in your mind/Why’d you put us through it Evil Genius/was it justified in your mind anytime you held a grudge?”

Now the thing with “Evil Genius” is it’s not really a bad song. In fact, musically it’s one of the most interesting songs in the Benatar catalog. There are horns, there’s a great guitar solo, Pat’s vocals are tight – rough and sweet just like we like her, and the middle break with all the horns and guitars playing off each other is excellent.

So I think it’s the lyrics that put many a critic into a tailspin. In the review of Precious Time in Rolling Stone (entitled “Spandex Ballet”) the reviewer says both Pat and Neil (the writers) should be embarrassed by the song. I think that’s a tad harsh, but I guess it’s not necessarily a song they should run around bragging about either.

These days, I really get into the song. The music is so excellent and its something that wasn’t really done at the time, particularly by Pat and the boys. Plus her voice is so powerful through out the track she could be singing the phone book and it would still be . the best thing you ever heard.

But I do have to admit, as a kid, the song did creep me out a little and even now, if you turn out the lights and listen to it, you will probably look around the corner of the sofa to see if that little evil boy is coming after you.

Stay tuned for tomorrow when we look back at the smoke filled voice of Kim Carnes and a little bitch named Beth who got me suspended in middle school….

posted by swivek @ 6:05 PM 0 comments